Mr. President: Where is Osama bin Ladin, and why haven't we caught him yet?
—Anonymous
Mr. Anonymous, I'm glad you asked that question.
United Stats intelligence is second to none. And I'm getting sick and tired of folks suggesting we invaded Iraq because we're unable to find America's most hated criminal. Fact is, we know exactly where Mr. bin Laden is. He's at the Tora Bora Comfort Inn, Room 221. He registered under the name Allan Fineberg.
We are saving his arrest for an important occasion such as the indictment of either Karl Rove or Dick Cheney or the mid-term Congressional elections.
Mr. President: Why do you keep saying that you are going to bring our troops back from Iraq, but keep sending more over? You seem to be more of a flip-flopper than Kerry, please explain yourself.
—Concerned Citizen
Concerned citizen, I'm glad you brought up that point.
I don't see any inconsistency or "flip-flopping" in our Iraq policy.
Currently, all the troops serving in Iraq have last names beginning with the letters A to G. We will soon be bringing back these troops. The troops we'll be sending over have last names begining with the letters H to P — completely different troops.
Mr. President, I have two questions. First, what do you plan to do about the current gas situation. Second, what is your reaction to "Sweet Neo Con," from the new Rolling Stones album, A Bigger Bang
—Volgolfer
Mr. Volgolfer, I'm glad you asked me those questions.
Regarding the gas situation, I have been working hard to increase prices at the pump to discourage energy use. If you knew anything about economics as I do, you'd know that higher prices lead to less usage which saves our environment. For my legacy, I want to be known as the environmental president. (And I don't think it's funny when folks refer to me as just the mental president.) High gas prices limits driving to those who can afford to drive— usually folks who own Hummers and SUVs, so we have fewer vehicles on the road which cuts down on accidents and pollution.
Regarding the Rolling Stones, I don't think America needs perverted, drug-doing English perverts to tell us anything about our politics. Although "Sweet Neo Con" does have a cool bass line.
(Got questions for the President? Drop them off in Comments.)
—Anonymous
Mr. Anonymous, I'm glad you asked that question.
United Stats intelligence is second to none. And I'm getting sick and tired of folks suggesting we invaded Iraq because we're unable to find America's most hated criminal. Fact is, we know exactly where Mr. bin Laden is. He's at the Tora Bora Comfort Inn, Room 221. He registered under the name Allan Fineberg.
We are saving his arrest for an important occasion such as the indictment of either Karl Rove or Dick Cheney or the mid-term Congressional elections.
Mr. President: Why do you keep saying that you are going to bring our troops back from Iraq, but keep sending more over? You seem to be more of a flip-flopper than Kerry, please explain yourself.
—Concerned Citizen
Concerned citizen, I'm glad you brought up that point.
I don't see any inconsistency or "flip-flopping" in our Iraq policy.
Currently, all the troops serving in Iraq have last names beginning with the letters A to G. We will soon be bringing back these troops. The troops we'll be sending over have last names begining with the letters H to P — completely different troops.
Mr. President, I have two questions. First, what do you plan to do about the current gas situation. Second, what is your reaction to "Sweet Neo Con," from the new Rolling Stones album, A Bigger Bang
—Volgolfer
Mr. Volgolfer, I'm glad you asked me those questions.
Regarding the gas situation, I have been working hard to increase prices at the pump to discourage energy use. If you knew anything about economics as I do, you'd know that higher prices lead to less usage which saves our environment. For my legacy, I want to be known as the environmental president. (And I don't think it's funny when folks refer to me as just the mental president.) High gas prices limits driving to those who can afford to drive— usually folks who own Hummers and SUVs, so we have fewer vehicles on the road which cuts down on accidents and pollution.
Regarding the Rolling Stones, I don't think America needs perverted, drug-doing English perverts to tell us anything about our politics. Although "Sweet Neo Con" does have a cool bass line.
(Got questions for the President? Drop them off in Comments.)
posted by George Bush at 10:28 AM
5 Comments:
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Mr. President:
How do you disorganize your day?
Dear Mr. President,
Have you ever seen "Steel Magnolias?" How do you feel about Michael Moore?
Sir, it's me again. I read somewhere that you have an iq of 93, which makes you slightly less clever than a gorilla, although probably quite a bit cleverer than an elephant. Is that true and if so how does that make you feel?
dear mr president,
I am french et j'adore votre blowgf.
(Je suis français and I litterally adore your blowgf)Can you tell me if you are "un soleil de la plage"?
(Pouvez vous me dire si vous êtes a sun of the beach?)
thanksgiving up.
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