Since Vice President Cheney seems to have no interest in becoming President in 2008, who would you like to see follow you in office? Which Republican would be the best choice to continue to advance your policies?
—Tallest String

Mr. String I'm glad you asked that.

I know a lot of you think I'm going to support my chubby little brother Jeb for the job. Frankly, I don't believe nepotism has any place in American politics. Just cause we're related don't give Jeb a jump on everyone else.

What I'd like to see is someone who shares my firm beliefs, my vision for an America free of Constitutional restraints, someone who is flexible, a person who understands there's a time and place for freedom and democracy as well as torture and spying.

I'd also like to see a woman as president, a compassionate conservative like myself.

For these reasons, I see no reason why the next Republican nominee for president should not be Laura Bush.

Being a librarian, Laura's read a lot of book titles. She knows how to organize. She's often said she thinks America would be a better country if it was organized under the Dewey Decimal System. For all I know, she might be right.

In a recent speech, you stated that you "accept blame for sending troops into Iraq based on faulty intelligence". What exactly does accepting blame mean?
—Lily Ovdawest

Ms. Ovdawest, I'm glad you asked that.

Well over 2,000 U.S. troops have died and 15,000 wounded based on this administration's mistake. Thirty thousand Iraqis or so have also died but that's neither here nor there. The point is I take responsibility. The buck stops with me. So I'm going to make it right.

My staff is currently looking for someone in the CIA we can fire. Whoever this person is, he's going to be fired without two weeks' notice and without a severance package. I know this sounds tough but that's what taking responsibility is all about.

I've also spoken to Vice President Cheney and he has assured me this won't happen again.

However, just because we entered Iraq by mistake doesn't mean we can say "sorry" and just withdraw our troops. We have to keep fighting for our cause, which is the removal of Saddam Hussein from power making the world a safer place.

I know what you're thinking. You're saying, we've removed Saddam so why can't we just leave. Well, there's a good reason to stay and fight. The reason is, we have a plan for victory. so until the United States is victorious, we must remain in Iraq.

I hope this clears everything up.